fanmade MV by ezze
Fan Fiction by mrdimples
Yoon Seo ran like a mad woman towards the hospital. Her heart was in her throat and she tried her best not to cry. But she felt the hot tears brimming in her eyes as she made her way to the ward, she screamed in her head “It’s all my fault! I shouldn’t have ignored him. I shouldn’t have shouted at him. What am I going to do? Please, don’t die Si On, please!”
It all started weeks ago when a new resident joined the Obstetrics & Gynaecology department. She was sweet, pretty and friendly. Many of the male interns and residents were all excited over her joining the hospital. Yoon Seo even heard that quite a number have tried asking her out. It didn’t bother Yoon Seo, in fact she was laughing at how Dr Hong from her team was tripping over himself to get a date with the female resident. Then one day, she saw Si On having lunch with the girl at the staff cafeteria, just the 2 of them. The girl was smiling and laughing throughout the conversation, she looked totally engrossed with Si On, Si On also seemed to enjoy her company. That scene bothered Yoon Seo for days and over time, she caught Si On and the girl on several occasions, eating at the cafeteria or talking to each other along the hospital walkways.
Yoon Seo started to tease Si On about the girl but Si On denied it. However when Yoon Seo probed further, Si On clammed up or changed the subject. Unlike in the past where Si On was unable to lie, he was capable of doing so these days. But she could still tell if he was lying to her and on this matter, she is sure he isn’t telling her everything. Yoon Seo told herself to be happy for Si On. For one, she is happy that he has found a woman who can reciprocate his interest and secondly, it will make her feel less guilty about rejected his love. Except that it does not. In fact, the whole affair is driving her crazy. It was like Si On invaded her mind. She kept thinking of their little moments in the past, of how he comforted her during her darkest moment, of how he cute he looks when he eats his kimbap, of how he made her laugh when he wriggled like a worm in the park and of how warm he felt when he hugged her that night. She remembered the hug very clearly. She wasn’t expecting it because prior to that, she has always been the one hugging Si On but it had always felt like how a noona will feel hugging her dongsaeng. However, that night the thing that surprised Yoon Seo most was how different it felt when Si On hugged her. Thin as he may look, he felt surprisingly hard and strong when he hugged her. His shoulders were broad, his chest firm and his long arms encircled her, making her feel safe in his buxom. She was so startled at her own response that she pushed him back. There was undeniably such a strong physical stirring within her that it tingles her whenever she thinks about the hug.
Yoon Seo thinks she is going crazy; she blames it on PMS that’s causing her hormones to go mad. When it happened the second time, she was even more affected. Si On had swept her into his arms when he prevented her from walking into an oncoming car. She should have been shocked by her near brush with an accident but at that time, all she was conscious of was his physical proximity. Her face was almost buried in his chest and she could smell him. Like her, he doesn’t use any fragrance. She can’t find the words to describe it except that he smelled really nice. Very ‘namja’ and nice. His hands were huge and they grabbed her shoulders tight as he spun her around from danger. She felt really safe and protected in his arms, her hands clutching his sides. Whenever the scene played in her mind, she will be lost in her thoughts for seconds. A few times, sunbae and Dr Han caught her daydreaming and smiling. It was so embarrassing.
She can’t be seeing Si On as a man, can she? She has always treat him as her dongsaeng, it wasn’t difficult when Si On was such an innocent, sweet and child-like man. Maybe, it’s because he has grown so much recently that she is now seeing him as an adult. That’s how she had explained to In Hae. Yes, this must be it and nothing more. Yet, why is she now stealing glances at Si On? Occasionally, at their desk, she would find herself looking at him and then she would quickly look away when his eyes meet hers. Whenever, he is busy on his rounds or when she does not see him for half a day, she starts to get restless and look for him. Is she falling for him? Yoon Seo shakes her head furiously as if her thoughts can be banished by doing so. These days, whenever he stands close to her, her heart will start to beat faster and on occasions when their hands accidentally brushed each other, it felt as if an electric current went through her. She jerked her hands back more than once, hopefully Si On didn’t notice her weird reaction. She reasoned she must be stressed by the recent cases , which is why she is not her usual self. After all, she was the one who told Si On to go back to being comfortable the way they were before his confession. Surprisingly, he seems to have taken it very well. It’s now her who is having the problem. Perhaps she should take a vacation or something, to clear her mind and get back the good old Cha Yoon Seo.
When Dr Han called, she just arrived home from work. Things finally blew up between Si On and her. Earlier in the day, she had invited him to her place on the pretext of cooking him dinner. She knew she was terrible in cooking but she had been perfecting a spaghetti bolognese dish over the past week. Si On had tried to impress her once with his cooking but failed. So this time, Yoon Seo wanted to show him how it’s done. However, Si On looked a little hesitant at her invitation. He said he had some things to settle. As far as Yoon Seo knows, Si On hardly goes out after work and heads straight home. When she probed, he remained tight-lipped, raising her suspicion further. Just as she was about to rescind her offer, he suddenly said he could do dinner after all but he will be late. He needs to run an errand first.
In the evening, Yoon Seo left the hospital earlier to shop for the ingredients she needed but headed back when she realized she had left something in the office. Just as she was about to reach the entrance, she saw Si On walking out with the female resident. There was this strange sour feeling in her stomach as she saw both leaving the hospital grounds. She did something she never thought she would, she followed them.
Si On used to follow her and now she is the one stalking him but her curiosity overrode whatever reservation she had. When she finally followed them to the jewelry section of a department store, she couldn’t believe her eyes. The girl was choosing some necklaces and Si On was actually smiling and giving his comments as she tried them on. How on earth has these two progress to this stage? Yoon Seo bit her lips, then she felt tears welling up her eyes. No, it can’t be. She was turning red with anger and embarrassment. Why is she crying? Has she gone totally mad? She should be happy that Si On is happy, right? So why does it hurt so badly? As she stood there dumbfounded, a hurried shopper brushed past her causing her to lose balance and fall onto some display. As the merchandise dropped onto the floor, the noise and commotion caused people nearby to look at her. Before she could react, she saw Si On turned in her direction and looked surprised to see her there. She panicked and fled the scene. She heard the female resident exclaimed something then she could hear Si On shouting her name but she didn’t dare to look back.
She hopped onto a cab and buried her face in her hands the entire journey back. She cursed at her stupidity. Why did she run? Now she is going to look like a fool in Si On’s eyes and the entire hospital staff will hear about it. She searched for excuses but could find none. After the adrenalin rush, she sat down to a hard truth which stared at her in the face and refused to go away. She had fallen for Si On, hasn’t she? Is she too late? Has he fallen for someone else? Tears streamed down her face. She tried to recall his behavior. He hasn’t changed, in fact he is now more caring than he ever was. They would walk home whenever they were off duty together. He will listen to her attentively whenever she had problems or cases to discuss. He brought her drinks and snacks when she was too busy to take a break. But what was he doing with that girl? Maybe his caring and concern for her now is that of a dongsaeng towards his noona or a hoobae towards his sunbae. Is that it? She had only herself to blame for pushing him away when he confessed. She fell onto her bed and buried her face into her pillow. She must have laid there for quite some time when her phone rang. She sat up with a start, could it be Si On? “Oh no! What am I going to say to him?” she thought as she scrambled out of bed. It wasn’t Si On on the line, it was Dr Han. Si On had been hit by a car, he said,”Come to the A&E quickly…” She couldn’t hear he said next, it was like a loud wind blowing in her ears. The room spun around her and she felt dizzy with fear. She managed to grab her bag and make her way to the hospital.
In the back of the cab, thoughts flashed through her mind while she sat at the edge of the seat. How did Si On get hit by a car? Was he not at the shopping mall just an hour ago? She bit her lips when the cab got stuck in the evening traffic, she pleaded with the driver “Ahjussi, please please make it fast to the hospital.” She closed her eyes and prayed “Dear God, please don’t let anything happen to Si On. I love him; I need to let him know I love him. Please be all right, Si On, please!” Finally the cab reached and she made a mad dash towards the A&E.
There was Si On sitting on the bed looking none the worse except for some abrasions and cuts. Dr Han was by his side. The heaviness in her heart immediately lifted and she ran over quickly to check if he was all right. Yoon Seo shot her questions at Dr Han about Si On’s condition in rapid fire. Finally satisfied that Si On suffered only a slight concussion and superficial cuts, she let out a sigh of relief.
After Si On was given a clear to go home and rest, Yoon Seo took him back to his apartment. Neither spoke on the way back. When they reached his apartment, Yoon Seo sat Si On down on the bed.
“You lie down here; I will make you something to eat.” Yoon Seo told Si On. But before she got up to go, Si On grabbed her hand. Yoon Seo felt as if an electric current shot through her, she pulled her hand away slowly.
“Why did you run when you saw me, doctor?” Si On asked.
Yoon Seo looked at him and tried to laugh “What are you talking about?”
“I saw you at the departmental store. You saw me too but you ran off…” Si On started but Yoon Seo interrupted him “Oh, I didn’t see you. I was going to get something but I realized I left my wallet …in the hospital…so I ran back.”
“Soo Jin saw you too. She was the one who asked me to chase after you. She said you misunderstood us. I don’t understand her, doctor. But I chased after you anyway because you looked upset. Are you?”
“Haaaa….Why would I be upset? Do I look upset to you?” Yoon Seo laughed awkwardly, trying her best to look surprised. “Anyway, what were you two doing, shopping on a date?” Yoon Seo asked, trying to act like she was teasing but she did not dare to look at Si On in the eyes.
“How can I date my college mate’s girlfriend?” Si On replied indignantly. Yoon Seo could not help but raised her voice “Then why were you buying her jewelry?”
“How do you know that, doctor? Did you see us?” Si On asked.
Yoon Seo tried again to laugh it off, “I just guessed, all right? Why are you so nervous?”
There was an awkward silence as no one spoke. She tried to change the subject and turned her attention to the cut on his chin.
“Aigoo, stop talking. The plaster is coming off already.” She leaned forward and smoothed the plaster back. Her heart was beating so fast that she was afraid he could hear her heartbeat. At this close proximity, she could almost hear his breathing and feel his warm breath against her fingers while she fussed over the plaster. He had a very nice jawline and she couldn’t help staring at his lips, they were well-formed, almost too beautiful for a man. She wondered how it will feel to kiss this man. She squeezed her eyes and shook her head, momentarily forgetting that he was right in front of her.
Si On looked at Yoon Seo and wondered why was she reacting this way? Was she angry with him? She looked really upset at the departmental store. He was quite sure she saw him but he didn’t know why she denied it. He was more alarmed at that point to think any further. He got Soo Jin to help him choose the pendant for Yoon Seo so he was shocked to see her there. It was meant to be a surprise for her birthday next week. He hoped she didn’t see it. Soo Jin was the one who told him to chase after her. Soo Jin guessed that Yoon Seo had misunderstood that they were together. Was that why she was so upset? When Soo Jin joined Seongwon University Hospital, she greeted Si On and told him that her boyfriend was Si On’s ex-college mate and had sent his regards. He had seen Si On appeared on TV and told her about it. Soo Jin was a nice and helpful girl and in no time, Si On found himself asking her for advice. Soo Jin thought that Si On had a chance from the things he told her. She encouraged him to take bolder steps and also offered to help him shop for a gift.
He had also read books and trawled the internet. Si On knows he has difficulty understanding people but women are another challenge altogether. Of late, she has been blowing hot and cold on him. At times, he could see the sincerity and concern in her eyes. There was also something more but he couldn’t put a finger to it. All he knows was that it was different from when he first joined the department and she took him under her wings. At other times, she got mad at him easily and would often reply him curtly or gave him the cold shoulder. Si On was bewildered, he couldn’t think of what he did that would upset her. That’s why he wanted to make her happy and was looking forward to surprise her with the pendant. Did she really think he bought it for Soo Jin?
“Doctor, I didn’t buy the pendant for Soo Jin.” Si On started and Yoon Seo looked up in surprise. “I…I bought it for…you.” Si On stuttered. “It was going to be a surprise but you saw it.”
Yoon Seo stared at him, speechless. Si On continued “But…but…can I give it to you on your birthday? I got it engraved so it’s not ready yet. They said I can collect…Why are you crying, Doctor?”
Yoon Seo was crying and breathing hard, she couldn’t keep it in anymore. She looked down at the floor and tried to blink her tears away. Si On panicked “Doctor, please don’t be upset. If you don’t like it I can change it. I know you don’t like me in this way but please accept my gift. You don’t have to do anything else. Just accept it, I only want to see you smile. Please.”
Yoon Seo looked up at Si On and saw that he was almost in tears. She shook her head and more tears streamed down her cheeks. He still loves her. She was the fool who kept hurting him, rejecting him and pushing him away.
“Doctor, please don’t cry. I know you want to be friends only but I cannot do it. I tried but I cannot. Please allow me to stand behind you. I won’t ask for more. I just want to see you smiling every day. It’s enough for me. Please don’t hate me…”
Yoon Seo put her finger to his lips and looked at him in the eyes. She shook her head, telling him not to say another word. Si On wiped her tears gently with his hand and this time, Yoon Seo’s hand went up to hold and caress his hand. Then her face leaned closer towards his until she was just inches away.
Si On’s heart felt as it was about to explode. He could not make sense of what Yoon Seo was doing, his mind did a quick scan of all the advice he read but nothing could help him understand what was happening. But when he looked into her eyes as he wiped away her tears, he saw a different Yoon Seo.
As she leaned towards him, his heart pounded even faster, he felt blood coursing through his veins and every cell in his body tingle. Instinctively, he reached out his hands and pulled her face towards his until his lips touched hers. Her lips were so soft and moist; he could taste the sweetness mixed with the saltiness of her tears on them. She was tentative and shy but she did not move away. He must remember to be gentle. As he lowered his hands to the small of her back and pulled her body closer, he could her breathing quickened and she pulled back a little. Did he do something wrong?
“Si On, I love you. I really do. I love you so much…” Then she closed her eyes, pulled his body into hers and kissed him back.
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